sex Archives | The Nuclear Unit

That’s Not the Best Way to Wash Mom’s Back, Dad

“First off, you’re not even holding the soap. You’re holding Mom’s hips. If you want Mom to have a clean back, you need to actually touch her back.”

Dad Unsure How to Bring Up Stumbling Upon Old Video of Wife on PornHub

By The Nuclear Unit |

“There she was. On top of a river boat in the green bikini she used to wear when we first started dating. A crowd chanting for her to ‘whip ’em out.'”

Tonight’s Sex Preempted By End of Netflix Documentary

By The Nuclear Unit |

“There’s nothing more important in a relationship than a strong, sexual appetite for one another. Unfortunately my appetite is gone. I look at her and all I see is a corn cob.”